Hurricane Sandy prompts question: "How do I really react to extreme situations?"

Communities recovering from the destruction of Sandy are just beginning the process of healing from the injuries to land, homes, psyche, and sense of safety. The conflicts between individuals born from the devastation were on the minds of some educators in Branchburg, New Jersey as they reflected on the challenges of forgiveness, and the choices each of us makes when facing conflict. Many of these educators sitting in Circles at Raritan Valley Community College were dealing with gas rationing just days ago, fearing they may not be able to get to work and provide for their families. As one woman put it, "I'd like to think I would share gas with everyone, but what if we really had nothing?"

Another choice one teacher witnessed, "In Marlboro people were physically fighting over milk."

Another teacher responded sarcastically, "And they were really hungry."

Others nodded knowingly, the unspoken question left hanging in the air, "What choice would I make if faced with more dire circumstances?" Teachers voiced concern about what people in their communities would do if faced with even more difficult moral dilemmas.

Moral Choice Points

Those moral choice points were the focus of the conversations of 40 middle and high school educators from across this relatively rural region of New Jersey half way between Philadelphia and New York City on a chilly late November afternoon. The teachers of Social Studies, History, English, Latin, and Special Education spent much of their time at a table of 8 people exploring the theme of forgiveness by asking, "What conditions have to be met for there to be forgiveness?"  "Under what conditions were you able to forgive someone" "What conditions were not met in a situation where you were not able to forgive someone"

One young woman volunteered to her group, "I don't speak to my father, haven't for 5 years. I need to forgive him. If I did start talking to him I wouldn't forgive him immediately. But I am slowly getting to the point of considering forgiveness." She added that even discussing this and thinking about this is a step in a positive direction.

The questions are raised by the life-transforming decisions of people who survived and perpetrated the genocide in Rwanda, and the continuing efforts to compel people there to reconcile, now 18 years after the 1994 genocide. Educators began the 3-hour workshop hearing from the Coexist documentary education project team, Director Adam Mazo, and Learning Director Dr. Mishy Lesser who introduced the film by saying, "The people you'll meet in our film Coexist shared their stories with us, stories of why they've chosen to forgive, or not, stories of how they've taken responsibility for their actions, or not, stories of why they think the genocide could happen here in the United States, and why some think that what is happening in Rwanda is best described as tolerance rather than reconciliation."

Is it all an act?

Some teachers were skeptical about some of the pleas for forgiveness they saw in Coexist, including when a man named Jean-Baptiste pleads for forgiveness from hundreds of people assembled at a reconciliation workshop. "When we saw them on their knees, asking forgiveness, it looks rehearsed."

Another teacher asks, "are they learning about this sort of thing somewhere?"

Ingando solidarity camps are mandatory for people being released from prison and students are compelled to attend them too. The camps are viewed by some observers and participants as a tool of social control, or even brainwashing. The government maintains the camps are meant to build unity.

Another teacher, one of the few men in the workshop, analyzes Jean's statement in Coexist about why he killed and why he is reconciling-- because the government told him to. He asks, "What happens if the state says let's revert to killing next Tuesday?"

Another teacher thinks, "Their attitudes suggest they would continue to commit acts of violence if they were allowed to do it."

A nun, who is also an educator explained how the process of dehumanization makes violence possible in any place, for any individual, "When you convince yourself the other person is no longer a human being you can do anything to them."

Othering and the desire of certain groups to elevate their status over other groups is a tendency that educators in the Raritan Valley are seeing in their schools and in their communities as new and different faces move to neighborhoods that used to be primarily white. Some educators are reticent to name and voice this observation publicly. Coexist aims to open up conversations about how to appreciate difference and build mutual respect among all people. That developing conversation will continue in many of the classrooms of educators in attendance at Raritan. One teacher, Kathy, will pair Coexist and "The Book Thief" for her 9th graders year-long multimedia research projects.

Stopping Hate on HMD

Observing Holocaust Memorial Day

Our team is humbled to be a part of Holocaust Memorial Day being observed across the United Kingdom and beyond tomorrow (Jan. 27). The mission of HMD, to end hatred, is something we strongly support. Dehumanization, intolerance, and inaction led to the Holocaust and the genocide in Rwanda in 1994. Coexist works in schools and youth development organizations regularly to build social emotional skills, to teach young people to build tolerance, become upstanders, and rehumanize peers and neighbors.

We invite you to join global efforts to stop hate by signing the pledge at the Holocaust Memorial Day Site: http://www.speakupnow.org.uk/sign_our_pledge.php.

And for anyone in London please come out for a free screening of Coexist tonight! Thanks to the Survivors Fund for organizing this event. Details are available here.

Students Reflect on Bullying, Genocide, & Non-violence

“A lot of people at my school need to work on taking a stand against injustices.” Nearly 250 students, from 9th through 12th grade joined in an hour-long discussion about the documentary film Coexist at Amherst Regional High School in Western Massachusetts on Thursday October 27, 2011. Upstander Director Dr. Mishy Lesser designed and facilitated the workshop prompting students to think about their own role in conflict. One student reflected, “I see fear, greed, and hate at school, which I was able to think more about.”

Teachers from English, Acting, Social Studies, and French agreed to use the Coexist Viewer’s Guide and screen the film before Mishy’s arrival. Teachers pooled their students in the library, taking over the space for five periods, thanks to generous support from the high school’s librarians. Another student observed, “You have to do something to stop harm. If everyone waits for someone else to do it, it won’t get done.”

During the workshops students developed a group definition of genocide, identified the behaviors that contribute to genocide, those that contribute to preventing the escalation of violence and scapegoating, and discussed which behaviors that contribute to genocide might be present in the school community, even if in a milder form. One student made an important connection, “Bullying is like mini-genocide. I [now see] the connection between bullying and genocide.” Another student said, “Genocide is caused by fear and greed, but also caused by people being bystanders, and people not taking action.”

Principal Mark Jackson and student leaders of STAND invited Mishy to lead the workshops. STAND is the student-led division of United to End Genocide. The event was planned over the course of several months, which allowed student leaders enough time to identify and recruit a variety of teachers to participate in the Coexist workshop. STAND group envisions a world in which the international community protects civilians from genocidal violence.

Following the workshop one student said, “In school people are quick to judge and write people off without fully understanding the other person’s situation, or even attempting to.” Another wrote, “The only way people can live in peace is if we communicate and try to practice non-violence. “

The event was made possible thanks to the generous support of Dean’s Beans Organic Coffee of Orange. The Coexist team looks forward to returning to Amherst Regional High School to work with other students and teachers, and is available to work in nearby middle and high schools.